These difficult days remind me of an earlier time, when I spoke to Bernadette about some difficult physical suffering I was going through. She said she hoped and prayed that I was not also suffering interiorly but were aware that God is with me and has ordained this suffering to prepare me for a whole new life. It is because God (eternal life with God) is not of this world that your being in this world has to go by the wayside in order to enter into God’s being – which is not in this world.
She went on to say that death and dying are not about anything else. Although dying is a positive transformative process, it is thought of as a ‘negative’ because it means leaving life as one knows it now, for a life that one does not know now. Man’s eternal life is of an entirely different nature than his present life. No one knows eternal life until it is a fait accompli. Because one does not know ahead of time, soul preparation must be perfect trust in God. The reason this is not easy is because it means giving up not only what one knows, but knowing itself. Everything one thinks is ‘life after death’ can be thrown in the wastebasket. In the garden, Jesus had to sweat out this unknowing, “to be or not to be” – how it would go after his death. How it really goes is nothing like man’s ideas of ‘eternal life’. Jesus said “Thy will be done”, meaning ‘however it goes, so be it!’ This is the last word on eternal life. Bernadette encouraged me to maintain ‘tough love’ for God – “that your trust may be perfect!”
Paraphrased from a personal letter